Needing a Parent’s Help to Sleep: Changing to the No Stay Option

Posted by in No-Cry Discipline, No-Cry Separation Anxiety, No-Cry Sleep


  1. Hello, I’m having some sleep challenges with my 14 month old. She is on a sleep schedule for naps and wake/bedtime and a nighttime routine. The problems are night waking and being dependent on nursing to sleep. At one year she is waking a handful of times at night and she can’t seem to get back to sleep without nursing. She will take rocking as a substitute but when we put her down she wakes up again. we’ve been transitioning her to her own bed and that was going well but now night weaning and she wants to be held all night. I would love for her to learn to self soothe enough to put herself back to sleep when she wakes at night and from naps. Is this possible to do gently?

    • Hi Tara – You’re dealing with a very common situation. A toddler who relys solely on nursing to fall asleep. To change this, begin to remove her from the breast before she is fully asleep. Then hug her and place her in bed – but keep your hand on her and shhh to her until she is settled. The technique is called the “Gentle Removal System” or “The Pantley Pull-Off.” There are several long chapters on this in The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers & Preschoolers. Check out my website for excerpts and tips –

    • Oh, boy! Night Nurslings are such a common question that I have several chapters on it in The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers & Preschoolers. If you want to send me an email I’ll send you an excerpt that fits your question. You can also read excerpts here:

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